Consider This!: My Face

So I have this face wound on my upper lip, and so today I got to make a battered wife joke.

"Hey Justin, what happened to your face?"

"What? Oh... uh this... I uh walked into a uh... a door."

It was awesome. No one laughed.

Or at least it would have been awesome had anybody been considerate enough to ask and had any of this actually happened.